Sharka the Butchering Amazon, and the galleys are finally here!

Yes, the galleys for my book, How High Should I Jump? The Satirical Guide to Pleasing Today’s Woman have arrived, and I’ve been spending the last couple days deep into the text, again (my word, I’ve poured over those pages so many billions of times, I can see when a comma is out of place at a mere glance!). I’d been licking my chops to get to this phase of the process, as it means, should my work on the galleys be accepted, that I’ll have a printed book sometime soon, maybe as soon as November 1st.

For those not familiar with publishing terms, the ‘galleys’ are what the publisher has done with a text in order to format it into shape for publication as a book. You, the author, examines how the publisher has constructed the galleys and you make whatever changes you see fit, other than the actual formatting, which is always done by the publisher. Now, as many of you know about me, I am a voracious worker, I simply devour my work and apply all my energy to whatever task I have before me, and this case is no different. I attacked the galleys and spent 2 days locked into analyzing and correcting them, sending them back to the publisher later in the week with a great deal of satisfaction. Now, we’ll see, in turn, how they react to what I’ve done, as this is always, aside from the actual contract signing phase, the most contentious aspect of the author/publisher relationship: agreeing on how the book should appear in print.

Got a while more to go in the back-and-forth, but this was a major hurdle, long-anticipated.

One email of note this week, from old friend, Byron G.: “Been reading your blog with interest, great job with the Outrageous Women but are you going to tell us who is next or make us wait? I’d LOVE to see a ‘coming lineup’ or something, and I can’t wait for you to do a piece on Thrasylla, because there is just nothing on her and I remember a talk we had years ago where you mentioned her. How about her?”

Yes, Byron, there is little on Thrasylla, only a few fragments and of course, the hearsay which I’ve gleaned from the master, D. K. Toteras. Sure, I’ll be investigating her but as to a lineup of who’s coming, I dunno, I’m more of a whatever-I-feel-like-in-the-moment kinda guy, but your suggestion has merit.

Speaking of History’s Most Outrageous and Powerful Women, I give you a real doozy this week, wow:

One of my favorite women from history, or really, an entire race of women, really has very little written record that we can accurately rely on. While this is true of every notable person the farther back in history you go, the myths and legends surrounding the female warriors known as the Amazons are especially murky, none more so than in the case of the mysterious -and thoroughly lecherous- Sharka the Amazon.

I’ll take a moment to go over some of what we do know about these mysterious warrior women. While we have no direct evidence to substantiate the claim that for many centuries, these women took the field and were victorious against men many times over, Plato mentions the Amazons throughout his writing and is quite clear in The Laws that they not only existed but were fully capable of holding their own on the field of battle. Too, there are so many incidental references to these warrior women, including repeated accounts in both Herodotus and Plutarch, that they simply must have existed at some point. Legend has it that they came from somewhere in and around the Lake Maeotis/Black Sea regions, known in ancient times as Scythia, though some claim they hail from the highlands near the river Thermodon in modern-day Turkey. Their society was entirely focused of women and included no men, unless for mating purposes or when won in warfare; these poor unfortunates were quickly turned into slaves with a very short lifespan. The Amazons were purportedly large, fast, powerful and beautiful, according to Homer in the Iliad, and termed ‘androktones‘ by Herodotus, or ‘killers of men’. It was long believed that these ‘amazoi‘ were women who removed their breasts in order to draw back their bows, but scholars, including myself, reject that claim: the sheer loss of blood to perform the procedure would make this act impossible.

I could blather on about Theseus, the great founder of Athens, who was rumored to have mated with the Amazon Queen, Hippolyta, and the various battlefield exploits in which they were never defeated yet no body was ever recovered of any dead Amazon, yet, my purpose in this blog is not dry historical recitation, but salacious sexuality, right? Moving on, then, a male unfortunate enough to be born into this society, if not dispatched at birth, would be raised with one intention only: becoming a sexual tool for these aggressive, lascivious and oh, so cruel women!

My mentor, Demetrius Toteras, one of the finest and most imaginative scholars to have existed, often told the tale of one poor unfortunate male, Timon, who was raised up to ‘provide seed’ for the Amazons wanting children. Timon was reported to have been strong, tall and beautiful, the best of their sexual tools and father to more than a thousand children, yet the exhausted stud died at the age of 26 or so after, Toteras claimed, a night in which he experienced over 30 orgasms! Yes, our hero, Timon, was literally fucked to death!

These women were tough to satisfy, believe me, but let’s fast forward over 1500 years to the 12th Century, where somewhere along the Danube River in Hungary, the last reported stronghold of Amazons, called ‘witches’, were thought to live under the ruler, Vlarka. Eschewing, again, reporting the dead historical facts, my interest lies in one of her principle warriors, Sharka, who was pressed into duty to defend her Queen after a nasty northern invasion of male warriors one summer and was reportedly, in the valley that was later named after her, responsible for beheading over 500 men in a single day of battle! This woman was not satisfied to simply kill, she liked to revel in blood, and when returned to her castle later that evening, had over 50 prisoners brought to her. I will moderate the details here for those squeamish readers, but Sharka spent the remainder of that evening in wanton sexual depravity, leading to the blood-letting deaths of every captive. It is said she had intercourse with every prisoner yet would allow none to climax; once satisfied, she then enjoyed seeing her paramour tortured and ultimately beheaded while having intercourse with her next intended victim.

Now, again, I am not condoning Sharka’s sexual appetite nor am I suggesting we develop another race of Amazons; I am, however, in admiration of how a woman like Sharka was able to both thoroughly whip her male opponents in battle and then devour them sexually a few hours later, and then, with only a day’s rest, to begin anew with fresh captives brought her and the cycle of satiation-unto-murder repeated! What energy!

Male historians have done their best to bury the exploits of women such as Sharka, and to reduce her conquests to either luck, or the ineptitude of the men who fought against her. I harbor no agendas aimed at propping up the patriarchy. I say, let’s strip aside History’s veneer and expose to all, if possible, the truth about so many neglected and scorned famous women. Their examples, it is my aim, should serve other women to boldly step forward with their own enterprises of whatever nature, knowing that there have been many brave and far-seeing women who’ve come before them to face near-insurmountable odds and yet have tasted the fruits of triumph. Women no longer need sit in the shadows and wonder what might happen if they take action; rather, using these famed historical figures as models, they can boldly strike out at their own personal objectives in the full confidence that they can achieve all that they desire, for others have done so before them, and with wild success.

Ultimately, whatever a woman wants, she should not limit or short-change herself at the onset of her enterprise by believing it can’t happen. Oh, it can happen, and eventually, women will come to enjoy the full support of the men in their lives. This is what I work to change, with warriors like Sharka breathing over my shoulder, “Work harder, mister, work harder…”

Yes ma’am!

My beloved San Francisco Giants have made the post-season and are looking at a probable Cincinnati Reds showdown. I fear no opponent, however, as I and my Giants have been schooled the old way: we take on all comers, and we don’t worry who we’re to face, our concern is on immaculate preparation, knowing that the Moment will take care of itself because we have prepared.

I say, Giants/Texas World Series, and you know who I believe is gonna take it!

Until next week, attend to the little details, breathe in the glorious fall weather, and enjoy!

6 Responses to “Sharka the Butchering Amazon, and the galleys are finally here!”
  1. Myron the moron says:

    Wow the ladys and her best friend the pussy . It s’ like dealing with two lovers. im learning every day to kiss both my girl friend and her pussy when I leave for work . To kiss my girlfriend sweet pussy its scary as hell but im at first base with it . Im starting all over and working to make it sing dance shit and cumm all over my body like a leaking fire hose . I love both but im vary scared it will, kill me . Its been one week just kissing it the smell is like gods gift. If you have and pointers to give me go a head. Im a sex doctor to . Myron the moron

  2. Tim Oscar says:

    Woa, this Moron dude is extreme, pussy can’t kill you tho maybe your GF’s pussy is nuclear!!!

    If your a sex doctor, why do you need pointers? Is this a friend of yours, Milt? Dude’s wild.

  3. Myron the moron says:

    Tim I am a all around life doctor that nows stuff abought life. And womans. But some to doctor s used doctors’ for help brush up on, stuff. Whores talk to whores on tips toget man harder .baseball player talk too player what they do to hit the ball better . Tim I think for a long times your ball sacks been over harder with sperm in them flush them out soon. I flush my ball sacks out every day in a pro soft balls are good but when pussy arives at door get them fucken, harder. We all need people and love remember tim. My brother call me up last week and told me abought milton never heard of him take care. Myron

  4. Tim Oscar says:

    ‘Flush my ball sacks?’ Thats fucking funny, ok I will go find a whore and flush them out! I’ll tell her its “doctors orders”!!!!

    I can’t wait to read Milton’s book, and I wish he would start giving us a few samples.

    Hey Moron, have you ever been betrayed?

  5. Myron the moron says:

    I been betrayed in 1990 from my handy caps friend mom was nice but she fuck, things up told the wrong people I was a alcoholic I thought she was a good friend . Thats fuck up my life cant foget abought it, times . I would of like her, instead put a strap on a fuck me in, the, ass ok. With alot, of chocken, graveyard a the lube . Myron

  6. Tim Oscar says:

    Woa, dude, you like to take a strap on up the ass? Can you also get somebody to proof-read your writing cuz I can’t understand some of it. I got the ‘up the ass’ part, but what’s “chocken”? Anyway, some handicap’s mom fucked you in the ass, or you WANTED her to fuck you in the ass? How did she betray you, by not using any lube?

    Milton, this guy’s like extreme but he’s cool. Any word on the release day for your book?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: