The Boston Marathon Bombing, the Forces of Fear and a Happy 4-20 to all!

Hey friends, happy 4-20 amidst a week of sadness, heartache and confusion at the Boston Marathon.

Like anyone, I suppose, I’m tempted to add my opinion into the mix of why these two seemingly well-educated and balanced young men would do the unthinkable and place bombs at the feet of innocent people, but not only do I not have any of the facts which would more inform my opinion, I am absolutely at a loss as to how to make sense of what happened, motives be damned.

Yet, the one thing I refuse to do is to become afraid, and with that, to turn my fear into hatred, hatred which can then be manipulated. No, Media, I will not do that, no matter how you keep slamming the atrocity into my Being. Yes, I am saddened by the event, but no, I will not swim in Fear, Sorrow, Regret and Revenge. Of course, I nor any of my friends or family were directly impacted by Monday’s events, but I am an American and every one of those people at the Marathon are my brothers and sisters, including, yes, the bombers.

This is not to say I condone or am not affected by the horror. I feel horrified and bewildered, words fail, even here; something numbing comes over me and I push away from the desk, shaking my head in disgust, again.

Yet I don’t also reach for the bromides of cliché, “Well, this is happening everywhere, we’ll just have to get used to it here,” or “It’s the Muslims, wipe ’em out!” or any such blather. No, the Forces of Hatred had their day on the 15th, and all week Fear has been bellowed by the wide-eyed purported ‘journalists’ screaming above their own din for more accurate injury details, “How many severed limbs did you actually…” but I, no I will side-step Fear and turn and face the bloodshed with Love. It is my only weapon, Love which leads to Understanding.

I am not saying, however, that I understand or even soon will understand what and why and all those questions begging for reply, but I know that to feed Fear with even more Fear is not an answer I am satisfied with, and thus I turn to Love and trust that by embracing Love, all IS well and WILL BE well, despite the difficulties of the survivors and the families of those lost and maimed.

“Oh, how callous and unfeeling, Milt! Don’t tell me you feel sympathy for those brutal murderers? Think of the suffering of everyone who was victimized!”

I am not without compassion for those who suffer any injury or disease, for I have had my share of both, but there is never a reason, no matter how difficult the circumstance, to become hateful, bitter, revengeful or angry with the portion of Life you have before you. As many are saying, if we become hateful and fearful over what has happened, the Forces of Fear win. I, for one, choose not to Fear, for Fear leads to Revenge and friends, the Chinese have it right in their ancient saying, “If you’re gonna pursue revenge, better dig 2 graves.”

And to those insistent on acts of piety including communal prayer for the survivors and those lost, while I understand what motivates those seeking prayer, I take a different course and would ask that we either pray for the entirety of Humanity including and perhaps especially those who committed these acts, or simply refrain from prayer altogether.

Like the Athenians who felt prayer to be unnecessary (“If Zeus truly sees all, then our prayers are redundant”) unless directed towards the betterment of the entire community, I take a similar view: let us pray for everybody, or nobody.

Since when does God exclude anything or anyone from His Kingdom?
~

I would like to get a little personal here, if you don’t mind.

I experienced another level of enlightenment in my stay in Brasil. I was able to go farther than I ever have before in forgiving and loving myself, which may sound odd to some but for others on a similar path as mine, I trust you understand what I mean.

For some time now, I have understood the spiritual/philosophical work before me but I have been playing with externals mostly, gathering more information and hoping I’d assimilate it all one day, when, in Brasil, I learned I had to –and wanted to– turn within for my solutions. Now I’ve known this for…well, forever, hell, I’ve been studying these themes all my adult life, but knowledge alone doesn’t always lead to experience and in Brasil, things changed for me, I easily, effortlessly turned within and saw and continue to see another road for me, and I am turning down that road and racing along it more every day.

That road leads away from Fear, from Guilt and Self-Loathing and looking back at one’s mistakes and regretting and being sorry, and instead, leads to loving and forgiveness and acceptance of who one is. Yeah, I am not chasing WHO I SHOULD BE any more, friends, only WHO I AM. I refuse to return to Regret and Fear, and no amount of prodding will make me budge, especially from the Media who do everything in their power to enslave us to, and with, our Fears.

Not me, I’m flyin’ away from that, and if that means forgiving these 2 butchers, then I do, just as I forgive me my initial reaction to the horror, when, for a brief moment I was flushed with anger, certain it was ‘them’ who did it and not caring who ‘them’ might be. Luckily I am monitoring my reactions more and more, so this knee-jerk-ism was caught quickly and diffused, without launching too much self-criticism my way, something I’m increasingly doing. Sure, you need a balance between blind, trusting confidence and the ability to see clearly who you are and are not, but the habit of criticizing yourself, of beating yourself up, is short-sighted and ultimately, destructive. No more. Every day I find something else I like about me, and I find more Good in this Universe, too, which I am increasingly turning my thoughts to rather than remaining trapped in the habits of Mind which have kept me from soaring, and which keep me judging others.

I am sick of judging others and I refuse to hate or fear the Forces of Fear, I choose instead to bypass them, ignore them. I offer love and support to the afflicted, and leave the rest to those who choose to work amongst the carnage and slaughter. I love, admire and respect those men and women, too, but their work is different than mine, and mine, friends, is to show you that all of that, every fear, can be overcome.

You will never (I know, ‘never’ is a strong word…) hear me bitch or complain about my life; I simply refuse to employ Blame and Regret and Worry and Fear, I turn my back on them and I stride towards a higher calling and a greater concept of myself. I am better than Complaining, I am better than Seeking Revenge, I am better than allowing my Fears to lead and distract me.

And you are, too!

So join me -metaphorically- as I go outside now and give thanks while I celebrate ‘the day after 4-20‘, that wonderful day here in Northern California, home of the finest smoke known to Humanity, when men and women turn to one of the best, most enjoyable natural cures our Creator has given us…

Enjoy!

r.miltonquibner@yahoo.com

Comments
2 Responses to “The Boston Marathon Bombing, the Forces of Fear and a Happy 4-20 to all!”
  1. positivesara says:

    Beautifully written and I am completely agree with you, the why does need to be looked so it maybe can be prevented again, but the excuse is not to be excepted. We all have choices, we have something our lives that we would like to change, violence to speak to a so called injustices is not the answer, but finding the courage to choose to change your circumstances in encouraging ways. Become the solution do not buy into the fear, I call it the CNN effect where they cripple you in fear and drama and where you are to scared to look at the problem and seek a solution.
    Fear for fear sake is non productive, will all those involved be fearful? yes, because it happened to them and it will take time to heal, but now is the time to show the hope, those that came together to calm and help people, to empower a solution and to find peace with in ourselves.
    Troubled boys in troubled lives orchestrated by troubled minds.
    My prayers and blessings go out to all those affected by this horror, but please do not let them win by keeping the fear alive.

  2. Love this one, Milt, thank you, thank you. I’m with you xoxoxoox Susan

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