Kind words from strangers on my Father’s passing, Mia has “surprising depth”, and the Tyranny of Being Consistent

Greetings again, friends! Kinda weird weather we’re having, eh? 80 degrees on my back porch in California, and my friends in Jersey are freezing their asses off…

I want to start today with a word of thanks for the several kind emails sent in regarding my Father’s recent death; I really appreciate it. Funny, all sorts of people have come forward to share their stories of my Dad, some of them I have never heard before, or sides of my Dad I had never seen. As a son, you only get a partial glimpse of your father and never really know him as a man or a friend. My Dad kept a great deal within, but it’s heartening to read the accounts of people that loved him. Thanks, everyone!


There’s some confusion already over just what I’m doing with the Milt n Mia Show podcast; got a couple people saying the same thing, let’s take an email from Karen, “I listened to your show with Mia and enjoyed it but it wasn’t what I was expecting (never get chained to your expectations, friends…). I thought it would be funny and light with a lot of sarcasm, and it was in places but Mia really has some serious things to say, I had to listen twice because of her accent but this woman has depth and a lot to say about some very important issues. Next time I’ll pay more attention.”

Karen, Mia does have great depth and yeah, her accent can throw you off but I’m glad you went and listened anyway. I’m hoping people can get passed the title -and my satirical references- to find the great wealth of practical philosophical insights both of us are focused on.

You see, it’s all about lightening our loads, people, and not making things any more stressful and serious than they already are; that’s why we take the approach we do, humor with reasoned opinion.

On that note, our latest MiltnMia Show episode is now up on Itunes, and this is a good one:

Should women be sympathetic towards men’s porn addictions?!-milt-n/id796661531

Mia has a great deal to say on this issue and I think she’ll surprise you. In truth, my wife, like all good philosophers, isn’t tied to her opinions; in other words, she is free to change her mind and revise her opinions if new information -or whim/mood- strikes her. Yeah, some may call that being fickle or even inconsistent, but since when do Leaders -or anybody really- have to be consistent at the expense of all else?

This is another great lie foisted upon us, that we must be consistent in everything we do, a line of thought and activity that goes A to B to C, right? Fuck that, what kind of moron adheres to the same thoughts despite shifting facts or new information? The concept of being consistent comes from a former period, the damned Victorians really and their vaunted Mechanical Period, when everything was reduced to its smallest element and everything had to be ordered. Fuck order, fuck consistency, screw being linear, I say, feel, don’t worry if what you said yesterday isn’t what you believe today, we have a natural right to grow in our understanding and our thoughts and that often means what we held as ideals and beliefs yesterday are not what we hold today.

How many of you have changed your mind about something you believed in once, then felt a twinge of guilt for not ‘being consistent’? It’s a rather cruel and dehumanizing thought, actually, and I for one reject that form of tyranny. I just hate watching political debates, for example, when so often something a candidate said years before is brought back and thrown in their faces; as if changing one’s mind is some crime, as if we MUST at all costs maintain the straight line of our thinking and cannot escape or re-think what we once thought, thunk, or thinked.

How unforgiving, and inhuman.


A note from Erroll: “Milt, listening to your audiobook and something hit me: do guys actually change their behavior after hearing this? I know it’s not meant to be a serious handbook but you got so much really fundamental stuff here that could help with jealousy and selfishness, I just wonder if anybody has ever actually done what you suggest.”

Great question, Erroll, and the answer is, some do, most don’t. I have received maybe 20 emails over the last year from guys or gals who actually heard some kernels of truth in the book that they could apply in their lives; several guys thanked me for showing them what blithering idiots they are to be holding jealousies, along with a few remarks on how difficult the task of actually changing your habits and patterns truly is, which I concur is a monumental job, that of re-aligning and, in truth, editing and/or monitoring our reactions.

There’s really no way of knowing the impact a work has on anyone, of course, other than the feedback they provide; judging from the reviews and what I have read in the emails, it’s a challenge that is simply overwhelming to the average guy, that of learning to become interested, engaged and supportive of your woman while toning down your selfishness and me-first thought processes and demands. Damn tough for most men, who think everything about them is just fine, “Why, I don’t need to change!” but for some guys, I know my book has had an impact on their lives, for no other reason in some cases than they have never read anything like my book and it comes as a refreshing draught of insane sanity upon their parched and thirsting souls.

I will be returning to a little more Classical Thought in my blog in the near future, as there is a literal dearth, a glaring paucity of real essential principles in our society; not that I alone can provide this, but for those who are ready, my occasional Classical Nudge might help.

At the very least, I hope to entertain.

My Mom just lost her boyfriend of 60-something years, a pain I don’t wish to imagine, so Mia and I are gonna spend the day with her. See you soon!

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