Challenging a friend over his phony PTSD, the true road to personal contentment, confusion between Sadness and Depression and the UC Santa Barbara Killer, and the friendly Horned Toad Lizard

…I’m still picking sand from my hair after a lovely stay out in the northern Nevada desert last week, ah! Sometimes you get a break just when you need it most and that long weekend was just the ticket. We had so many great events and moments it’s hard to recapture them all for print, but I’ll note a couple incidents around the campfire that remain memorable.

One of my old friends had come up for a visit and, like all of us, was just floored by everything; he was no outdoorsman and his occasional forays out where I love to be have always been amazing experiences for this life-long city dweller. One evening after a long day trekking about, we were sitting by the fire reflecting and opining on whatever, when the subject came to his soon-to-be-ex wife. My word, like night and day, how his mood suddenly changed.

I’m just depressed, Milt lost my job last year and now all I have is part-time work and she’s been riding me so damn hard for being a failure that I just decided not to give a shit anymore. I know I kinda fell apart, and then my family history of depression finally caught up with me and that’s why she left me, she didn’t know how to handle it.”

Wait a minute,” I jumped in, “There is no such thing as a/

She started teasing me, too, and then she just lost her patience and started doing her date nights and now…I just don’t have any luck, I guess.”

Luck? It isn’t about luck, and depression isn’t some genetic thing that must grip you, and/

I just don’t think I’ll ever know what it’s like to be happy, you know? Maybe I’ve got permanent PTSD…”

Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder? From what?

Boom! Mia cut right to the quick.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself, you brought everything on yourself, all of your problems are self-generated and you do not have PTSD! Look at Milt and what he and I have to go through every day, you think he has time to indulge his disability or to cry about PTSD? We have every reason to act like we’re traumatized victims and make everybody feel sorry for us, but we don’t because we hope our example helps others stop crying about how hard their life is, and you know what we go through and you’re still acting like this? You should be ashamed of yourself!”

He dropped his head and I grabbed her wrist and pulled her onto my lap, a finger to my mouth, ‘shsssh’ before turning to my friend.

Life, God or whomever only took my body, but what I’m left with, nothing and nobody can take that and that’s my mind and feelings, my feelings of loyalty and honor and acting on what I know to be right and my feeling of trust in the ultimate goodness of Life itself. Who or what can paralyze feelings of honor, self-respect, love and affection? That’s the road to contentment and happiness, not in pleasing anybody else but in learning and then doing what you know is right for you. I just know what is meaningful to me and what isn’t and that allows me to feel contentment always, cause no matter how bad it gets or how bad I feel, I just know what everything passes…everything…”

We all sat quietly for awhile, my words hovering in the air, till he stood up.

You’re right, of course, it’s easy to get all wrapped up in your problems and forget that others have it a lot worse…you know, I still haven’t read your book but maybe I should.”

Yeah, damn right you should!” I shouted, “You need to have a little fun with Life’s problems instead of being dragged down by everything, and you need a little more courage to continue, so yeah, dummy, read my book!”

…Advice I extend to anyone who gets so wrapped up in the deathly seriousness of their so-called problems


And now, some very big news:

The launch of our new website,!

Our new website is as simple and direct as we could make it, featuring our podcast and booklet and background on who we are, with relevant links. Mia and I decided to not clutter things up with redundant links and splashy ads, we went bare-minimum and easy-to-read for all our busy, intelligent readers who don’t need to be pounded repeatedly with product mentions.

And yes,, with its homepage of beautiful legs and asses that everybody seemed to love, is now gone, but my book in all its formats is available on the new site, so take a moment and look it over:


This week’s MiltnMia Show podcast:

Confusion between Sadness and Depression and the UC Santa Barbara Killer

Milt and Mia discuss the differences between Sadness and Depression and how so many people confuse the two. Mia suggests most people are not depressed but sad, which is a natural reaction that all of us have from time to time, rather than a condition begging for treatment. Included in the discussion is the failure of Psychologists to really help the UC Santa Barbara Killer.”!-milt-n/id796661531

If you don’t have an ITunes player, you can hear it directly on TuneIN:


Our booklet, The Get Over Yourself! Handbook on Cheating and Betrayal, now available in paperback, Kindle and all e-book formats, is out now and the reception continues to be wonderful!

Thank you to everyone who has either purchased a copy or expressed interest, and yes, there’s a lot of general Life information in there; you don’t have to have been betrayed to get some solid insight from this manual; here’s the link at Booklocker:

For those that prefer Amazon, here’s the link:


One fun little incident:

I was star-gazing in my sleeping bag pre-dawn one morning, when I felt this odd scratching at my cheek. I instinctively grabbed at my face and lifted up a small baby Horned Toad Lizard, couple inches long. The thing had snuggled up against me and wasn’t at all spooked, and Mia and I sat playing with it for awhile. Beautiful little dinosaur; we finally released it on a large rock while we made breakfast but there it sat, just watching us. I gotta believe the wonderful good-vibes of that magic location made all of us family. Sure felt like…

Alright enough reminiscing, Life moves forward and so do I, please visit our new website, and Go Giants!


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