Americans create their own problems, laughing at the phrase, “I can’t,” and Oppressive Mothering Syndrome (OMS): Smothering your kids with Fear

I was asked the other day, in a radio interview coming out in November, why my blog was remarkably clear of any of today’s headlines. “Milt, shouldn’t you get in step with what people want to hear?” the hostess said, and I replied, “No, I disagree, rather than fueling our fears, I gotta not give in to the hysteria and stay the course.”

What ‘course’ might that be?” she quipped. “Mocking everything?”

Now, this was one of the rare interviews I’ve done where the host/hostess didn’t stick to the usual script of reading off the pre-prepared questions and essentially giving the guest an un-critical forum to hock their wares or describe and explain their unique programs. On this show, the hostess wanted to get to the meat of my views immediately and forget what I wanted to say, she was on a hunt for The Truth (when the show goes live, I’ll leave a link in an upcoming blog; you be the judge rather than me).

I generally avoid digs and other antagonistic techniques meant to put me in a defensive posture, and so when I recognized, like Perceval, she was undaunted in her pursuit of exposing ‘the real truth’ behind what I do (as opposed to the false, fake or unreal truth? hmmm…), I blew passed any and all defensive reactions.

You’re right, of course,” I replied, “I do tend to mock, exaggerate and make absurd the events and situations that erupt and catch us all off-guard, but what’s funny is that, where you might think people would be offended by my style -and some are, don’t get me wrong, I’ve had more than one person cry ‘foul’ over me ripping and making fun of counseling and therapy in general- the odd thing is that my audience just keeps growing and I am weekly sent emails telling me, ‘Love what you do, Milt’.”

I am sure she sensed I was being ‘disingenuous’. “But how can any real learning take place if you, the expert, are not taking seriously client’s unique conditions? And you never adequately explained what your course really is?”

I could see I wasn’t going to let off the hook with any flippant and sarcastic remarks, so if she wants some so-called ‘truth’, let’s give it to her…

I think people are taking their problems way too seriously; how can you actually get some objective perspective on what’s troubling you if you’re intensely gripped by it? Lighten up, I say, back off and breathe, you’re not the only person on the planet struggling with their difficulties and to be quite honest, if you could see yourself in the midst of your afflictions and how poorly you’re acting, you’d be ashamed, especially while there are people who actually suffer.”

Everyone’s pain, Milt, is legitimate, and one person’s struggle may not be so easy as another’s, and I think you should be much more sympathetic, I really do.”

No, I sympathize with people who are doing whatever they can to overcome their struggles, but with people who wallow and in effect celebrate how hard they have it, people who just don’t see anything other than themselves and demand the world pay attention to them no matter how petty their issues may be, I say, ‘Who do you think you are? Knock that crap off and get over yourself’!”

This led to some real howls of indignation from the hostess, but I was heartened -not that I needed it- by the first caller to the show, “Milt, I love your attitude, I’m sick of everybody whining about how hard they got it here in the US, I’m an immigrant and I think people make their own problems here, try living where I come from for even a month, then tell me about how bad you have it.”

Where do you come from?” the hostess asked.

Bangladesh!” he replied.

Indeed…

Oh and my ‘course’, by the way, IS to laugh at and even mock our fears and worries, in order to lessen their sting, and especially, to be on the lookout for The Big Dreaded Bugaboo:

I can’t.”

Bullshit! Of course you can, you just don’t want it bad enough and have grown comfortable surrounding yourself with fears!

~

Speaking of fears…

This week’s MiltnMia Show podcast:

Oppressive Mothering Syndrome (OMS): Smothering your kids with Fear

After Milt introduces the show, they talk about their book and the Compatibility Checklist and why it should be read before your begin a relationship, before Milt introduces his own psychological condition, OMS or Oppressive Mothering Syndrome, where women “…screw up their relationships by smothering their kids in fear and worry, while neglecting their husbands.” Mia replies, “This trait in women has always happened, as women by nature are protective, but now with the Internet, we know everything especially the latest news instantly, which leads to over-worry. Worry is one of the worst things you can do for yourself and to others; what happens to the kids? They become fearful; how are they going to learn if they don’t fall and make a few mistakes?” Milt adds, “Women always say, ‘I’m doing what is best for my kids’,” and Mia says, “They spend all their time looking at other people’s troubles and can’t look at themselves because they have too much time on their hands. Essentially what these women are telling their kids is, ‘I don’t trust you’.”

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/get-over-yourself!-milt-n/id796661531

~

Well well well, look who just ‘stole’ Game 1 of the NLCS from St. Louis: why, it’s the San Francisco Giants and, what’s this, another deep run into the playoffs from the team that nobody respects? Oh, my, how surprising

Go Giants!

 

r.miltonquibner@yahoo.com

MiltnMiaShow@gmail.com

MiltnMiaShow.com

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